MORE and more fathers are taking a step back from their busy everyday life to reconnect with their children.
Between demanding work schedules, financial pressures and the fast pace of daily routines, dads are choosing to be more present, carving out time for shared adventures through travel.
Let’s dive into how these fathers are reshaping the traditional “authoritative” role in the family, prioritising active participation in their children’s lives.
Modern fathers
For Dr Sharkawi Che Din, 54, a professor of computer animation at a local university, the decision to embark on regular travels with his son stemmed from a “void” he experienced in his own childhood.
Growing up, Sharkawi rarely spent time with his father, who, like many men of his generation, viewed a father’s role as a mere financial provider.
“My father was always working. He didn’t have the time or the mindset for family trips,” he recalls. “That absence stayed with me. So I made a promise that when I had my own child, I would do things differently.”
And he has. For nearly a decade, the photography enthusiast and his now 18-year-old son, Afiq, have been going on photography expeditions across Malaysia together. From cool highland retreats to coastal fishing villages, they have captured the country’s beauty through their lenses.
More importantly, they have built a strong bond that many fathers and sons rarely enjoy.
Meanwhile, Azlan Andi, 34, has been exploring the world with his twin sons since they were just two years old. While most people associate gifts with something tangible, Azlan has a different point of view.
“I believe the most precious gift we can give our children is time and memories,” he says.
Azlan wants to be part of his children’s core memories by creating little moments with them.
The content creator travels frequently and has made family adventures a priority.
“My kids were invited as ‘baby influencers’,” he shares. “So travelling together eventually became a natural thing.”
The family has set foot in more than 13 countries. Back home, they have explored every state in Malaysia. “I find domestic travel especially meaningful. Not only does it expose the kids to our country’s rich and diverse wonders, but it also strengthens their connection to the local culture,” Azlan says.
Evan Lanier, 42, a photographer from the United States, began his travel adventures in a campervan, road-tripping through 46 states in the US with his four children. What started as a classic family road trip soon turned into international journeys to places like Guatemala, Ecuador and Papua New Guinea, sometimes with all six family members along for the ride.
One especially eye-opening trip was to Malaysia, which he explored with just his son, Gray. Though brief, the visit sparked a realisation: He wants to keep discovering
the world with his children.
“A global worldview is something many children don’t get the chance to experience,” Evan explains. “Travel gives my kids that gift.”
As for Ray Mak, 40, a Youtube artist and content creator, he started bringing his sons, Zac and Asher, on adventures abroad even before they could talk or walk, exploring beautiful places both within Malaysia and beyond.
The initial motivation was to make the most of the flight discounts for children under a certain age.
They went without expecting much, but it turned out to be “one of the best decisions” he has made as a parent.
Each trip has given Mak a front-row seat to his children’s growth – watching them grow not just in size, but in confidence and awareness of the world around them.
Being present
Sharkawi says that travelling with his son is about more than just seeing new places or taking photos. “It is about showing my son that being truly present matters,” he explains.
He believes that being involved in their lives – including listening to them and growing with them – is crucial for their emotional and mental wellbeing.
Their photos, often shared on social media and photography forums, have garnered plenty of attention and praise.
For many, fatherhood is traditionally all about fulfilling duties – from providing for the family to instilling discipline – Sharkawi says. But today, he observes that more fathers are embracing an emotionally-present role. “That shift means building a deeper connection with my son through shared experiences rather than just responsibilities,” he says. “Being a father isn’t just about rules or routines any more.”
Azlan agrees with Sharkawi that fathers are leaning into emotional connection, with technology and flexible schedules making things easier now.
“It’s the accessibility,” Azlan says.
Although he didn’t travel with his own father when he was young, Azlan still holds deep respect for him. “I remember how much I missed my dad’s hugs when he came home from work,” he recalls. “It was a different kind of bond, but strong enough that I still feel it today.” Azlan admits that he was the most pampered or sheltered among his siblings growing up. But he knows that the world his children are growing up in is “tougher”.
That’s why, he explains, “I am raising them to be not just kind and compassionate, but strong and self-reliant.”
For both Sharkawi and Azlan, presence is the foundation of trust. As Azlan puts it: “Children
need someone they can talk to. Someone they know is really there.”
And that’s what both fathers are striving for: friendship, openness and trust.
For Sharkawi, that openness was nurtured through years of road trips and long photo walks with young Afiq. What began as a hobby gradually became a sort of ritual for the duo.
Now, Afiq is just as passionate about photography as his father is. “It is where we connect,” Sharkawi shares.
“We give each other feedback, share memories behind the photos, and that shared space has transformed our relationship. We are like friends now.”
When they travel, Afiq opens up to him. “That’s when the important stuff comes out,” Sharkawi adds.
Meanwhile, Azlan says travelling with his now nine-year-old twin boys has done more than just bring them closer. “Seeing the world so young has made them more open-minded.”
Experiencing different cultures and lifestyles has not only widened their perspectives in ways a classroom never could, but also encouraged them to step out of their comfort zones and try new things.
Going to new places shows kids how to think on their feet and do things on their own, encouraging them to not be overly dependent, Azlan says. His children are now more confident in unfamiliar situations, quick to adjust when met with unexpected changes and eager to learn from their surroundings.
“They ask questions. They see things. And they are curious just by being out there with me.”
That’s exactly why Lanier is passionate about travelling with his children as well. For him, it’s about keeping their sense of curiosity alive, just like his father did for him. They didn’t travel much when he was young, but the few trips they did take left a lasting impact.
It wasn’t about how many places they went, it was about the experience they shared.
His father’s presence during those formative years has shaped not only how he sees the world, but also the kind of father he hopes to be today.
Lessons from the road
Mak says that once his children are outside the familiar setting of home, they often surprise him. “They show sides of themselves I don’t always get to see,” he reveals.
During a recent trip to a personal development camp, Mak had the chance to witness this. “It was incredible watching them learn from older students, how they handled pressure, managed their emotions, balanced work and play, and supported one another,” he says, proudly.
What he found especially
meaningful was how naturally his boys fit in to different situations. “They were meeting strangers, learning cultural differences,” Mak says.
One thing Azlan has noticed about his twins is that even though they look alike, they have very different personalities and interests. “Travelling has helped me discover this,” he says.
It is ever important for parents to know their children, as it helps reduce misunderstandings and builds stronger, more respectful relationships. When kids feel that their parents genuinely care, it helps them feel valued and boosts their confidence, too.
“I don’t just see them as my kids, I see them as their own people. Our bond is more than just parenting, it is about understanding each other,” Azlan shares. Forgetting camera gear, unexpected
nd downpours and getting lost were the kinds of hiccups that could have derailed a photography trip. But for Sharkawi, these challenges became the very experiences that made his bond with Afiq stronger. They had to handle the situations together as a team.
“I was surprised by how calm and resourceful Afiq was when under pressure,” he says.
It is easy to think that teenagers might struggle in hard situations or that parents are the ones teaching all the lessons. But on the road, Sharkawi found out it was the opposite.
“Instead of me teaching him, I learnt a lot from him.”
These challenges showed qualities in Afiq that everyday life might not always bring out. He is also creative and observant, which helped him win photography contests both locally and internationally.
One of Sharkawi’s proudest moments was in 2023 when Afiq won first prize in a contest called “Picture My Rights”, organised by Unicef in conjunction with World Children’s Day in Semporna, Sabah. His photo of a toddler sitting on a boat in the ocean captured the daily life of the Pala’uh people who are deeply connected to the sea.
But that wasn’t all. The year before, Afiq also earned first place in the Philippines Youth Photo Competition.
“Watching him work hard and stay positive allowed me to see a different side of him – one I might have missed if we hadn’t spent time together travelling.”
Azlan says that travelling with young children also means being ready for anything, like knowing how to soothe them when things don’t go as planned. For example, getting detained by immigration in another country.
During the height of Brexit tensions, Azlan and his then twoyear-old twins found themselves being stuck overnight at a British immigration centre. Escorted by police, they were caught in a situation no parent ever wants to face, especially with toddlers in tow.
The twins were too young to understand what was going on; the unfamiliar voices and chaos around frightened them. Instead of panicking, Azlan kept his children calm, reassuring them that everything would be fine.
Perhaps, when they are old enough, they will share this story, as well as all their travel experiences with friends and fellow travellers.- By GISELE SOO
It all boils down to dad-ication
Always there: Long (left) with his triplets Kelly, Matthew and Nicholas and wife Pauline Ho (second from right).
Modern fathers are breaking stereotypes and leading the charge at home
PETALING JAYA: From triathlete trainers to content creators, some modern fathers are challenging norms and showing that being a great dad isn’t just about the paycheck – it’s about showing up.
For Sean Long, the best reward is being able to see his children do well in life.
The 61-year-old from Kuala Lumpur took the road less taken by being the primary caregiver to his now 19-year-old non-identical triplets Matthew, Nicholas and Kelly, who are also triathletes.
“I have worked as a realtor and also for major corporations in the tech industry while my wife is an auditor at a big international firm. It has been more than 12 years since I have held a traditional job.
“Frankly, I think the term ‘stay-at-home dad’ is inaccurate because in the last decade or so, more men have been taking on jobs in the gig industry or jobs with flexible work hours to support their children.
“As the primary caregiver, I cover the weekdays while my wife does the weekends. Since my children are triathletes, a lot of their needs revolve around running classes and such.
“I am glad I undertook this role because being present during all those moments matters. This is part of the rewards of parenthood which many parents may not be able to experience,” he said.
Fathers Day will be celebrated tomorrow.
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In terms of the challenges of being a primary caregiver, Long said some of the toughest aspects include the disconnection from the conventional career path and witnessing peers climb the corporate ladder.
However, he noted that as long as the parent is happy to be a primary caregiver, such thoughts should not matter.
Mohamed Salahuddin, 42, from Klang, starts his day at 5am with six children in tow.
It has been 13 years since he decided to be the stay-at-home parent while his wife works as a human resources executive.
“I still work as a content creator, like TikTok and video production, but I am the one who wakes the kids and sends them to school. I also send my wife to work, then I continue to care for our youngest child, who is seven months old.
“I manage my work by setting up appointments at night, and handling the kids and housework during the day.
“There is a stereotype tied to being ‘Mr Mama’ as we are often considered to be unsuccessful, unemployed or lazy, but the truth is that handling the household is a never-ending job.
“We don’t have a support system and don’t really get to share our experience with others, which can lead to suppressed emotions or even depression,” he said in an interview.
Picture perfect: Sah with wife Sher, son Charlie and daughter Arabella.
For freelancer Sah Henn-Wei, 41, from Subang Jaya, choosing to become a primary caregiver was a way to help his financial planner wife, who was having trouble caring for their daughter due to post-partum depression in 2016.
“Then, my son came along and the load just doubled. I decided to leave my full-time job as an art director at an agency as the working hours were not flexible.
“It wasn’t a hard decision to make as my own father was a teacher and my main caregiver as a child,” he said, adding that his gifted daughter also requires more attention so having flexible hours is a bonus.
Sah wakes up at 5.30am, gets the kids ready for school and does the house chores while they are away.
He then gets some of his work done, prepares lunch and dinner, and then puts the kids to bed.
Asked about challenges, he points to not having many friends to talk to and making sure the household runs smoothly.
“Having to put my career aside to do this has made me doubt my choices many times, especially when I see my friends become heads of companies and jet setting around the world. Yes, the adage that ‘comparison is the thief of joy’ rings true.
“But being able to be home and be there for your kids while they are growing up has been the best feeling ever. I wouldn’t trade it for the world,” he added.
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There’s a wonderful education film about bringing a new life form back from space — it’s calle d “Life.” Everyone should watch this for context. And the Chinese have
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